Alright, so listen up, y’all. I went to see this here movie, “Five Nights at Freddy’s,” and let me tell ya, it was somethin’ else. Don’t know much about these fancy things like video games or whatnots, but my grandkid, they love it. So, I figured, why not? Gotta keep up with the young’uns, right?
First things first, this movie, it ain’t for the little bitty ones. Google says it ain’t good for them kids under 12, and I reckon that’s about right. See, there ain’t no blood or guts or nothin’ like that, but those robot critters, them animatronics, they’re creepy as all get-out. They got these dead eyes and they move all jerky-like. Gave me the shivers, I tell ya. Made my skin crawl like a bunch of ants were marchin’ on it.
Now, the story, well, it was kinda all over the place, if you ask me. Somethin’ about dreams and feelin’ guilty ’bout somethin’. I didn’t quite catch it all, to be honest. Felt like they were tryin’ to be too clever for their own good. But hey, maybe that’s just me bein’ old and simple. Kids these days, they like complicated stuff, I guess.
But here’s the thing, even though I didn’t understand all that mumbo jumbo, I still kinda liked it. It wasn’t scary like a horror movie, not really. It was more like… jumpy. Lots of things jumpin’ out at ya, makin’ ya yell. My heart was thumpin’ like a rabbit in a dog kennel half the time. And them animatronics, they were somethin’ to look at. Real fancy-like, with all their gears and wires. Someone put a lot of work into makin’ ’em look just right, that’s for sure.
They say the fella who made the game, this Scott Cawthon fella, he wanted to make a movie for the fans. And I guess he did a good job of that. There was all sorts of stuff in there that the fans seemed to like. Little things, like the way the pizza place looked, and the way the robots moved. My grandkid, they were pointin’ at the screen and whisperin’ all excited-like. Said it looked just like the game. So, I guess that’s a good thing.
- The movie was kinda jumpy, not really scary.
- Them robot things, the animatronics, they were creepy.
- Story was a bit confusing, all about dreams and guilt.
- Fans of the game, they seemed to like it a lot.
The folks who know about movies, them critics, they didn’t seem to like it much. Said it was boring and not scary at all. But what do they know, anyway? They’re always lookin’ for somethin’ to complain about. Me, I just wanted to have a good time, and I did. Well, mostly. Except for when those robots jumped out at me. That wasn’t so fun.
Overall, I’d say it’s a decent movie. Not the best I’ve ever seen, but certainly not the worst. If you like jump scares and creepy robots, then you’ll probably like it. Just don’t expect it to make a whole lotta sense. And definitely don’t take the little ones. They’ll be havin’ nightmares for weeks, I tell ya.
One more thing, that art direction they talk about? It was really somethin’. The place looked old and rundown, just like it should. And them robots, like I said, they were somethin’ special. You could tell they put a lot of thought into makin’ ’em look real creepy.
So yeah, that’s my take on “Five Nights at Freddy’s.” Not perfect, but not bad either. Just a good ol’ jumpy movie with some creepy robots. And that’s all there is to it, folks. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go make myself a cup of chamomile tea. All that jumpin’ around got me all jittery.
And that’s my review! Now I have to go fix my garden. Those rabbits are eating all my vegetables.
Oh and remember what I told you. Don’t take the young kids. It is creepy! Now I am done. Go do something useful.
Tags: [Five Nights at Freddy’s, FNAF Movie, Movie Review, Horror Movie, Animatronics, Jump Scares, Scott Cawthon, Film Review, Game Adaptation, Teen Movie]
