Alright, let’s talk about this Jaws movie merchandise, you know, the stuff you can buy after watching that scary shark movie. I saw it back in the day, scared the bejesus outta me, I tell ya. But folks nowadays, they love buyin’ all sorts of things with that shark on it.
First off, you got yer t-shirts. Everywhere you look, shirts with that big ol’ shark mouth open. Some got the movie poster on ’em, some just got the shark. They got ’em for men, women, even little kids. I seen one the other day, bright red, shark lookin’ like it’s gonna jump right off the shirt and bite ya! Good quality cotton, they say. Wash it good, it’ll last ya a while, they say. But me? I ain’t buyin’ no shirt with a scary fish on it.
Then there’s the hats. Baseball caps mostly. Again, with that shark. Black hats, blue hats, even pink hats, if you can believe it. Says “Jaws” right on the front, so everyone knows you like that shark movie. They say it keeps the sun outta your eyes, but I reckon any old hat can do that. You pay extra just for that shark picture, I tell ya. Waste of money, if you ask me.
- T-shirts with the shark logo
- Hats saying “Jaws”
- Little shark toys
And the toys, oh lordy, the toys! Little plastic sharks, big plush sharks, sharks you can wind up and they swim in the bathtub. I saw one the other day, you squeeze it and it makes this chomping sound. Scared the cat half to death, I tell ya. Kids love ’em, though. Goes to show ya, kids these days ain’t scared of nothin’. They even got these little boats, like the one in the movie, the Orca. You can play like you’re huntin’ the shark, I guess. Seems kinda dangerous to me, even if it’s just a toy.
But it ain’t just shirts and toys, no sir. They got cups and mugs with that shark on it. You can drink your coffee in the mornin’ and stare at that big ol’ fish. They got keychains, so you can carry that shark around with ya all day long. I even seen blankets with the shark on it! Imagine tryin’ to sleep with that thing lookin’ at ya. Gives me the shivers just thinkin’ about it.
And then there’s this candy stuff. Little tins, they call ’em collectibles. Filled with candy. One tin got the movie poster on it, another got a picture of that crazy fella Quint and his boat. They say it’s got mints inside. Mints shaped like boats or somethin’. Seems silly to me. Candy’s candy, right? Why they gotta put it in a fancy tin with a shark on it?
Now, some folks, they collect this stuff. They got whole rooms filled with Jaws movie merchandise. Shelves and shelves of sharks, big ones, small ones, all lined up. They call it “collecting,” I call it hoardin’. But to each their own, I guess. They say some of this stuff is worth a lot of money, especially the old stuff from when the movie first came out. I wouldn’t know nothin’ about that. To me, it’s just a bunch of junk with a shark on it.
You can find this stuff all over the place these days. Online stores, of course. They got everything online. And in the stores, too, sometimes. Specialty shops, they call ’em. Places that sell all sorts of movie stuff. I seen some of it in the regular stores, too, though. Even in the grocery store, sometimes. That shark is everywhere, I tell ya. Can’t escape it.
So, that’s the deal with Jaws movie merchandise. Shirts, hats, toys, cups, candy, you name it, they got it. If you like that shark movie, I guess you’ll like this stuff. Me? I’d rather spend my money on somethin’ useful, like a good pair of shoes or a nice warm blanket. But that’s just me. Folks like what they like, I reckon. And plenty of folks seem to like that big ol’ shark.
They even got accessories, I heard. Wallets, phone cases, all kinds of things. If you really want to show the world you like that movie, I guess you can cover yourself head to toe in shark stuff. Personally, I think it’s a bit much. But hey, who am I to judge?
So, if you’re lookin’ for Jaws movie merchandise, you won’t have any trouble findin’ it. Just remember, it ain’t gonna make you swim any faster or catch any bigger fish. It’s just stuff. Stuff with a shark on it.
And that’s all I gotta say about that.
